LIFE Shaking Us AWAKE

I was responding to a friend asking me who was Baby Kaleb. As I wrote back I began to realize something, making me think back .....

(my response, and a picture of my own little Rat Pack at dinner)
He's a baby who was shaken by his baby sitter and has gone thru a lot...but now getting better.....chuckling to myself (as I started to make the following connection)....

.....just like all of us....we've all been shaken in some way...........and if we weren't shaken too hard and no permanent damage occurred, we can heal....
....and thinking very rarely does life shake up so hard that we become (permanently) broken....and maybe even that life shakes us when we're ignoring our inner guides/feelings/intuitions ......

......life shakes us awake, making us conscious, waking us up to consciousness.......ending relationships, careers, and other choices we've made that aren't right for us anymore (but can't see it)...

(and now my thinking back)
Not sure if this makes sense, but after I hit "send" I thought, "I should have saved that to remember later". After I clicked "save" I thought, "Why are you saving this? Either share this thought through a post now or expect it to get lost in that hidden Land of Narnia you call your computer".

It's still hard for me to believe that the thoughts I have make sense to, or are of interest to anyone other than, myself. I remember being so mentally jazzed by a movie called "Mind Walk" that on the drive home I couldn't stop talking about it. My first ex-wife couldn't stop looking at me with a blank stare and telling me I was talking too much.

She and I are good friends now, but after I write 90% of my thoughts I still think, why would anyone want to read this, and click the "save" button, keeping them locked away, forgotten and unshared with someone it might help or passed along to someone that it could.

I have an idea! Why not truly become great friends, even best friends, BEFORE marrying someone? If the great/best friend part doesn't happen, then maybe the marriage part shouldn't either. Brilliant! I bet no one's thought of that before...........They have?.........I'm the last one to realize this?...........Well, better late than never I suppose.

Having a sense of humor about yourself helps heal the bruises. And maybe the "bad" things that happened to us weren't really so bad. Maybe what we see as the "tragic" events of our lives was LIFE waking us up to things we couldn't see for ourselves.

I'm listening to the KanYe West song I put on my MySpace page, called "Stronger". That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger. Sometimes we wish it would kill us, because then the pain would stop. But if we can hold on, sometimes just one minute longer, we DO become stronger.

So even after two failed marriages, I'm strong enough to trust in another's love again.

Even though the second marriage put me in the hospital with a heart attack, I've come back to life and am healed from my being shaken.

Man, talk about life literally nearly shaking you to death like a rag doll and saying, "You want to love and value someone more than you love and value your own life? Fine! You want to work yourself to death trying to make something work that isn't supposed to? Alright, tough guy. Let me introduce you to a REAL Bad Ass - DEATH!"

So Yes! I'm strong enough to try love again......YES! Bring on the next Ex-Mrs. Stuart.......Ooops, I mean Mrs. Stuart............O.K. Maybe I'm not quite all the way healed yet in the trust department (totally laughing at myself right now :)-

But I do know I am strong enough to hold on, for one minute longer at a time, to the belief that my greatest strength, my greatest gift called LOVE, isn't also my greatest weakness, and the cause of my inevitable and impending demise the next time I allow myself to risk it all.....

I'm just a little worried that if I strike out a third time I might get thrown out of the game entirely, the umpire saying, "Get this idiot out of here. He doesn't deserve to play anymore."

So shaken and stirred, but not broken, I share this with you, NOT that you might feel sorry for me in any way. Feeling sorry for someone NEVER helps them get stronger. And why would you feel sorry for someone who has become healthier, happier and wiser? Yes it happened through pain, pain I wished would have killed me at times so it would stop hurting so deeply. But which has given me greater strength, greater power, greater happiness, and a greater vision of what it means to REALLY live!

I'm even MORE loving now, appreciating what a valuable treasure it is, and realizing that although we can't control what we get from others, we can control what we give. It's not about becoming hardened inside, just more insightful as to who you give yourself to.

So if anything, send vibes of healing my way, just as I do to all of you who have been shaken in some way. And thanks to a new friend request who has "Express what you feel, when you feel it" on their page.

It gives me the courage to express these thoughts I'm feeling right now. ....and seeing life's shaking as a way of waking us up to things we aren't seeing for ourselves.

We needn't be bitter by it, just heal FROM it, and be grateful FOR it.

Too many of us are living in a dream-like state, instead of consciously creating and living in a state of our greatest dreams.

Just don't shake a kid. Life, the next time you want to shake a kid, shake me. Someone like me has a better chance of surviving it. We've shown that. We've earned the right to risk trading our lives for that of a child's. If you're going to shake them, just shake em a little, you know, hide their bear or something. (All of my children have the look of their mother, thankfully. But all of them have my personality, or inner look, which I've "lived" to think is pretty damn good, and the only one that matters to me.)

"Man" On FIRE!

Watching a bit of Man on Fire, the 1957 version with Bing Crosby (not Denzel Washington, who played an incredible role that hit so close to home in the later version that I shook in the parts where he shook).

"That's all I have to say about that." - from Forrest Gump).


At the end of the film, Bing's girl says about his son, "He's growing up".

Crosby replies, "So am I".

How cool is that? "So am I".

We're all still growing up, and we all, myself very much included, need to remember this and allow ourselves to continue growing, upwards, forever closer to our best possible selves.

Why live any other way, than our strongest, smartest, happiest, harmonious and most passionate selves?

IT'S A GREAT WAY TO LIVE!

Why fear our inevitable deaths? Why not instead look death in the eye and say, "Take me anytime you'd like; I'm living fully and freely in the NOW, and giving life EVERYTHING I HAVE!"

"I'll fight you and will not go quietly into the night. But if you win and snatch the life from me, I can say, I WASN'T AFRAID TO LIVE."

Death ALWAYS happens to EVERYBODY........LIVING happens among FAR TOO FEW.

Just make sure that isn't you. Whatever you dream about, DEVELOP! Live your dream! Live while you have LIFE!

You and I ARE going to die. The question is, ARE WE REALLY GOING TO LIVE?

Entertaining God - Part 4

But how do we do this? ..............Magic! The magic of energy.

Where does it come from? .......From within and from others.

What if we run out? ........ We give more.

What?!?..........We don't give up and (become) hope less. We give more.

That's impossible! Once we've run out, we've run out!..........Only to the limited and unenlightened it is impossible.

But we're all only human..............We're all MUCH MORE than we think we are, and even much more than that.

And I'm sure I could continue this conversation with my human side arguing for its limitations and my Inner Spirit speaking only in terms of true realities.

(Tainecea wanted me to see what she had written. I told her I was too tired. She persisted so I got up using my "cane", pretending to be an old man. She showed me a note she had written, thanking me for believing in her. Like Magic! I didn't feel old the rest of the day).

Sages do not collect anything. They give everything, and the more they give, the more they have to give. - Lao Tzu

I am not a sage by any means, I only know I mean to become as wise and sage-like as I have to in order to pull off another year of truly appreciating the life I've been given.

To do my job and inspire the highest student growth possible, to research and write the best masters' thesis possible, to write my books and blogs with the purest intent possible, to meet the demands of everyday life as much as possible, and most importantly...... to love my children as lovingly as possible.

Why does one piece of coal get crushed by the earth and another squeezed into a diamond? I don't know. All I know is that I'm being squeezed just like you are, and I'm determined to survive and be able to offer more to the world, not come out of it just another broken person with broken dreams, dreaming only of breaking even in life.

We are all here to thrive in life's joy and abundance, not just barely survive. Exceptional people living exceptional lives shouldn't be the exception, it should be the rule!

I am still in the process of learning how to do all this, and end up canceling dates and appointments and unable to return all my phone calls and emails. My phone rang in class the other morning and as I turned off the ringer I absent-mindedly said, "If I don't recognize your number, I'm not answering".

After a short pause, one of my new students said, "What if that person was just arrested and you were his only phone call?" Taking a moment to first realize that I had thought out loud, I burst out laughing at Andrew's witty comment, picturing Jim Carrey in "Liar! Liar!" grabbing the phone as a prison guard was pulling him towards his cell. (Andrew in green, jumping into his buddy Nick's arms. I had them wear the goggles to lunch because they looked so funny.)

And magically, I had the energy to take the time to talk to Andrew and the rest of the class about the many forms of intelligence they all have, including comedic.

I was told this kid might not do well for me because he gets bored easily. All I know is that Friday he aced all three tests I threw at the class, each test challenging them to think at a higher level. He was also the first one done, while others were struggling with the second test. This allowed me to get him started on a science project that he demonstrated to the class later.

And now I realize even more that love and laughter are always all around, life is always alive and happening, and energy is always abundantly available, for those who give everything they have, and magically have more to give again.

Alone we tire, together we inspire. Let's all work together in becoming exceptional!

- Wishing you Inner Strength, Inner Harmony, Inner Happiness & Inner Passion,

Adam

(Kelly also finished the the tests successfully which allowed me to teach her how to find a science Web Quest on the internet that will enrich the class beyond the textbook. I'm proud of you Jello-Quan.)

Entertaining God - Part 2

As Christ, Buddha, Ghandi, the Dalai Lama and even Zoroaster have said in one form or another, "With our thoughts we create our world." So I started thinking how I made it through the day before, hoping for inspiration to make it through another, and really thriving in life and helping others do the same versus just trying to survive in it.

I had gotten up at 330 to get caught up on my grad school research/writing. Didn't get nearly enough done before the coffee had worn off and time was running out to get to the gym before picking up Sofia for school.

Answered a few emails before I left and felt a new surge of energy from the positive thoughts of the messages I read.

Took that energy to the gym but at the end of the workout was staring at the 90 lb. dumbbells in front of me, wondering how in the helen of troy I was going to have the strength to lift them.

Started calling out the names of my students in barbaric yalps with each rep, thinking that if I could have the strength to lift these weights I could lift my students for at least one more day.

Finished and stumbled into the showers, mumbling a good morning to the anonymous old man next to me. Was greeted back with an explosive "Hello! How are you doing this fine morning young man?" Felt so uplifted by his good energy I started talking to him and found out yesterday was his 84th birthday. A BIG Happy Birthday to my new friend, Sandy Graves.

Took the energy I got from Sandy and gave it to my Sofia as she ran into my arms when I picked her up. Told myself I'd get things done on the 45 minute trip to school but found myself listening to her tell me all about her latest dream and everything she was excited about at school. Her excitement gave me the energy to give my full presence to a parent meeting before class began.

Found out this parent is truly dedicated not just to his son's education, but education in general, giving me hope that I'll stop being seen as unique and exceptional when he said that the way I teach should be the rule versus the exception. Gave me hope that I'll stop being seen as a renegade teacher who has impossible energy and that ALL children will be seen as and taught as if they are gifted, because THEY ARE!

Welcomed my students to class, fired up to have another day of positive creation, only to find out the 2nd and 3rd highest readers of the class in terms of effort are in the principal's office for a fight that involved being thrown over bus seats and bloody mouths.

All that effort being thrown away in one moment of loss of control and now in danger of getting themselves suspended. All that energy on all three of our parts now wasted. Felt glad I was so physically drained from the workout because I really wanted to throw a desk through the wall........

To Be Continued.........

Nature ~ Wonderful ~ Pure ~ Rich ~ Real

NATURE WONDERFUL



NATURE PURE


NATURE RICH


NATURE REAL


~WONDERFUL~
~PURE~
~RICH~
~REAL~


IN YOU & IN ME


~ WONDERFUL ~ PURE ~ RICH ~ REAL ~


FREE!

Wishing You Passion in Peacefulness
- Adam

Love Longing - Crone Wisdom

A friend asked what our obsessions were. I'm paraphrasing my reactive response.

LIVING LIFE before paying the final price ,
Giving up this human experience,
Going down into the ground,
Beginning the climb back up,
To the spiritual realm
From which I came.

Then I read this post by LoVe*addict, and saw in it's truth the foolishness of two things:

1. Looking outside for the love that must first come from within.

2. Not having fun with this wonderful adventure we call life,
afraid to live - instead of living with a lust for life, fully appreciating this experience we have been given as spiritual beings having a human journey.............

and LIVING it FULLY from WITHIN!

Wishing you,

Inner Strength, Inner Harmony, Inner Happiness, Inner Passion

Enjoy, from LoVe*addict's friend, Moriah:

----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: LoVe*addict
Date: Aug 26, 2007 10:52 AM




Love-Longing
Crone Wisdom
by Moriah

You are really in search of yourself, without knowing it. You are love~longing for the love-worthy, the perfect lovable. Due to ignorance you are looking for it in the world of opposites and contradictions. When you find it within, your search will be over.

Namaste

~♥~

Love & Thanks to
posted by Moriah
Moriah
forwarded w/Love,
≈1îghtw¤rkers.R.u§≈
LoVe*addict