The Real Power of the Law of Attraction

......continued from "Our Children Are Watching"

Yes, humor helps. But maybe I shouldn't sing along with Rex Harrison so fervently when we watch "My Fair Lady" (1964). As Henry Higgins and I act out the song "I'm an Ordinary Man", my children have come to see it as a promise to them that I won't get married again and won't ever be hurt again. They do love me quite a bit.

But I'm teaching them a fairy tale that being vulnerable with the right one is a bad thing. Worse, the idea that isolating yourself from love can lead to a fulfilling life. "No man is an island."

Love is all around and only by letting it in can you have great power. I parent, write, teach, fight for right and ride my motorcycle, all in great love (love for the wild, crazy, free spirit in me).

We just have to know what the "right one" means to us. My poem "Just ONE" lets me know who that is, for me. It came from deep inside, after 60 days (mid December to mid February) of religiously practicing letting go of all my negative emotions that had built up over the past 15 years. Through daily practice I learned to find real love and true happiness within myself versus seeking it outside from another person.

Then one night (2/19) I couldn't sleep. My emotional guidance system was speaking to me, letting me know I now knew the answer, and could finally allow the right person to come into my life. Instead of distracting myself with TV, I was at my computer till 4am telling the universe what this Just ONE was to me.

The Law of Attraction is powerful, and 30 days later I was making my first trip to Chicago, and have come to realize even as recently as yesterday (@60 days from when I declared to the universe what I truly wanted by writing that poem) that I met people there who will be in my life forever. My entire life has changed from one of terrible confusion and anguish to great clarity and confidence. I flow in joy and inner desire versus trying to force things to be the way I want them to be. By allowing this to happen I have become alive with the reality that I am creating a life for myself and my family way beyond my wildest dreams.

This doesn't mean everything will go smoothly. Since my change I've had great support from Laura, Brian, my family, and people like Pam, my grad studies partner, who sent me a text saying "All of Florida awaits your return". These people see the good in me and appreciate what I can give, allowing me to stay in my flow of progress and joy. And I am grateful for them.

I've had others, and you will too, who don't understand the new you, and will complain and criticize you for the lack of what you can give. But as you continue to listen to your feelings, your emotional guidance system, you will realize which people are in harmony with your dreams and which are not. We can't force anyone to be in harmony with us, to understand our minds and hearts, and appreciate us for what we do give versus don't.

Bruce Lee is still very alive to me. He was a philosopher as well as a martial artist. And when he puts his hand on my shoulder and says, "Be like water my friend", I hear.... let the beauty in you flow from your core, your truest and best self. Only honesty and truth can flow from this place. And that is your most beautiful you. Some will see it. Some will not. As long as you see it you will radiate and attract the right people in your life, Guaranteed!!!!

I am a man who has become very happy with who he is, unafraid to pursue AND EXPECT TO ACHIEVE previously unimaginable dreams. And I am attracting the right people into my life who are helping make that happen.

So what makes the right one for you? Be sure you have learned to love yourself first - don't expect someone else to do that for you - terrible co-dependency that way. It is also unhealthy to seek or "hunt" for another to fill your needs. Being needy will also only attract another wrong partner, someone who sees themselves as your "rescuer" and you will resent them for it later. Learn to fulfill your own needs first, imagine the "right one" for you, and that person will come into your life.

Believe it, expect it, and appreciate it, and end up like Henry Higgins and Eliza Doolittle, Todd and Angie, my mother and father, brother and sisters, grandmothers and grandfathers, and so many others all around us, if we'll just "look up" and learn from what they're doing right and what "we", and not our former partners, did wrong) ..............or you could say "hogwash" to it all and become a marriage counselor. I hear there's good money in it.

(Oooh, yeah. Pursue making money to make you happy. The secret is in pursuing true and honest joy within yourself, be OK with your own flow, then allow all other matching things to flow to you). Who knows? Maybe you'll create such a full life that your thoughts and accomplishments will go on living long after your body hasn't.

"It's not so much about death, but life itself" - Laura Lee

Copyright © 2007 by Adam Stuart
All Rights Reserved

Our Children Are Watching

Looking at the post from yesterday and appreciating Todd and Angie even more ("What is Love?"). I remember them calling their children while we were at the airport to say goodnight. I see "16" and "14" in my notes. Must be their children's ages.

What a wonderful example they have set for their children; a marriage that does work, that does last. I cannot say I have set the same example for my own children. I know I and their mothers have tried, but we could not do it.

I've heard them say things from "I'm never getting married" to "I'll marry a man, have a baby, then when I get tired of him I'll kick him out and marry another man."

Ouch! Not a great "reality" these children have learned so far. And it is too bad that so many of our nation's youth are growing up with this idea of marriage. Since it is truly "too bad", we cannot allow it to continue.

We must point to examples like Todd and Angie as proof that it does work, and the reasons why; such as appreciating each other and being consciously grateful for one another.

It does seem as though what you appreciate you continue to have in your life. What you take for granted is taken from you. And when you focus on the problems in a relationship all you get are more of the problems.

By thinking about, talking about and taking action on solutions to the problems we have in our relationships with our own children, we single parents are showing them how to do the same with the future person they fall in love with.

And if they still are pessimistic that they can find someone whose been taught the same skill, they can always become a marriage counselor. This seems to be a growing career field :)

.....to be continued

Copyright © 2007 by Adam Stuart
All Rights Reserved

What is Love?

Ahhhh...... Another great trip to Chicago. Waiting in the airport, very sad to go, but very thankful for the time spent there (even tho it was soooooooooo cold).

An amazing time with a close friend and a family I am truly blessed to have in my life. Why so amazing? Becuz not only was I surrounded by happiness and incredible possibility, but I was loved was loved e-x-a-c-t-l-y-a-s-I-a-m and appreciated for e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g-I-d-i-d. And you know there's no better feeling than that. Lot's of love for me!

I felt like a watered and nurtured plant, covered in love and placed in rich soil. When that happens there are no limits to how high one can grow! Of course my mother asked me to shave my nasty looking goatee becuz it covered up her baby boy's pretty plant face, but it grew back quickly, didn't it? Hi Mom!

Actually the clean-shaven look made the trip back to Florida less eventful. On the way up north my plane made a stop in the Charlotte airport. As I was hanging out and talking on the phone, I was carefully watched and surrounded by one, then three, then seven security personnel! I guess they didn't like the goatee look either.

Do I look like a guy who would cause trouble??? No love for me.

But on my way back to sunny and warmmmmm Florida, I got to the airport early, just like I was supposed to (my beautifully ultra-organized older sister would be so proud). Without the goatee people smiled at me and said hello, except for the security guard who thought I was trying to smuggle my coffee in - man that guy gave me a nasty look - "No liquids. No liquids." No love. No love for me.

So, coffee-less and time-full, I sat down and started reading a book. With a noisy family to my left and some stressed-out travelers to my right, I began looking around for a more peaceful spot.

"Hmmmm. All the good spots are taken. I can handle this. Just put your head down and focus."

I did my best to block out the noise as another couple sat down across from me, now being totally surrounded. Within five minutes I felt myself distracted again. But it wasn't stress this time. It wasn't even noise. I was tuning into something else, and I began to have a warm feeling. I thought maybe it had to do with what I was reading so I didn't lift my head. Then it was almost as if someone was telling me to "look up". I didn’t want to ruin my good feeling, so I dismissed it and continued reading.

Then I heard it again, "look up", in the same soft female voice. When I did I only saw a couple across from me sharing a sandwich. Nothing remarkable going on. They weren’t even talking. I started to look away when I began to notice that in the midst of all the talking and movement around them, they were still, just leaning against each other and picking up parts of the sandwich quietly. I noticed how serene they were. My warm feeling grew. They weren’t overly tired, and weren’t overly affectionate, just peaceful, at peace being with each other.

This is love. You are watching love.

I took out my notebook and wrote:

“What is love?” at the top and began writing what I was hearing was the answer. With my eyes closed I could feel the closeness between them, and it felt so good that I couldn’t help assume they were married. I finally spoke up and asked them how long.

“23 years”, they said.

23 years......A huge modern-day success story! Todd and Angie from Bowling Green, Ohio, are a walking accomplishment of what less than half the country can do. I talked to them for a short while and before my plane boarded I shook their hands, thanking them for sharing their story with me.

As I sat in my seat I took out my notebook and looked at what I had written:

Maybe how the little things are shared is a reflection of how long lives are shared. Maybe it’s how you do the simple things that matter most. Are they done together? Are they appreciated? Are the little things the spouse does appreciated? Is "I'm grateful for you" spoken as often as "I love you?"

I took out my pencil one more time, and wrote:

Maybe "The Secret" to a happy and long marriage is in how you share a sandwich together while waiting for your flight at an airport. Thank you Todd and Angie for showing us that the answers to our problems are all around us, if we'll just “look up” and see them.

(The morning after I wrote this I made a continuation called "Our Children Are Watching"

Copyright © 2007 by Adam Stuart
All Rights Reserved