People often look at someone who accomplishes great things and say, "My God, how lucky is he. It's as if he's magic! I can't do that." Or they will say, "Oh he thinks he's so much better than I am. I'm going to look for ways to take him down off his high horse." In business this is known as the 80/20 rule, where 80% of the staff will choose to be negative towards new ideas and others' successes, sometimes violently attacking them. After 10 years in business my experience validates this rule to be true.
Very few (about 20%) will say, "My God, how focused he must be. He must have chosen to have courage in those times when he doubted himself the most! I'm going to choose to be courageous too in my own life experiences. I CAN achieve the same or even greater results!"
After almost 10 years in education, I would also say that from my experience the 80/20 rule applies here, too.
Unfortunately, or should I say fortunately, I find myself in one of those times right now. For the past month I've been blessed to have one hard thing after another come into my experience, offering an abundance of potential for learning and growth.....provided I have the courage to choose the path of learning and growth.....making another evolution upwards towards all that I and the world around me can become.
The state tests came back, the Bible, God's word from on high of how well students, and therefore teachers, and therefore principals, superintendents, districts and states did. I teach at an A school, with A teachers.
I am not saying I am a better teacher, only that I am a different teacher. While the average student in traditional classes increased their reading score by 18 points from the year before, the average student in my class increased their score by 121 points.
Do I have magical powers? Of course not. All I've done is observe the things great teachers of the past have done and the great things teachers all around me are doing today, and apply them where appropriate to each student individually. Teaching to each student in each subject each day is very difficult and seemingly impossible.....
Although I and I'm sure others have proven it's not impossible...in the current educational system....it does leave a teacher completely exhausted....and worse
And there's no incentive or motivation to teaching this way.
Then a computer virus wiped out my lesson plans and I had to write each one all over again, taking the entire first week of vacation and 2 hours of sleep a night. I had renewed my anti-virus software back in December but had been too busy teaching and studying to make sure it had installed correctly......Now I'm more exhausted.
While my college classmates called in sick during the year to complete their thesis, I went in sick to teach, leaving me sicker at the end of the day and unable to work at all on my thesis.....Martyr? No......It was simply keeping a promise to my students that they would all be prepared for the state tests....
My father taught me that if you're going to do something..........do it right......do it all the way......and do it honestly.....keeping your word about what you say you'll do.
Many other things have happened just before and during this state of exhaustion that have made me question myself. 18 v 121....I should have gotten a burst of happiness, confidence, and rejuvenating energy from this outcome.....instead I'm flat on the ground with my face in the dirt.
Analyzing the test results wasn't to see if I was better than others, only to see if my efforts, this individual-type of teaching, truly made a difference again, or if the past years were flukes. A few days ago I picked up a piece of paper to write something down. When I turned it over it was my analysis of last year's state math scores, showing an average student increase of 113 points from the year before.
But a very big part of me wanted this year to show little, if any, difference, hoping to justify going back to teaching the traditional way with a clear conscious, that it didn't really matter. I would teach one lesson one way to one group and if a student didn't get it then the parent can get them a tutor. I wouldn't be doing anything different. Nobody would be on my back. My job wouldn't be in any danger.
I will have done my job and still have the time to do the little things like paperwork and getting things turned in on time. I could get another job and not have to worry about paying my bills. I would have so much energy left at the end of the day I could write the myriad of books in my heart, finish my thesis and perhaps pursue my doctorate, accept speaking engagements when asked and go to dinner with people who want to meet and speak with me, some of them well-known celebrities.....I could even learn to play the Spanish guitar and simply go out with friends and have a good time.
I could have balance in my life!
But 18 points v. 121 is staring me in the face...........and it's a challenge to stay connected to humanity, devoted 100% to the experience I am having and paying attention to what's happening all around me, and to determine what exactly is the trash in my head I need to take out.
(continued on in This is When the Magic Happens ~ Act 2)
No comments:
Post a Comment