To My Children

A Christmas hug

From me to you

My heart opens up

And covers you


You'll never know

What a gift you are

Without your love

I couldn't go far


So on this Christmas

And forever more

I give you my all

From Winter to Fall


Merry Christmas 2007

Daddy

- Adam Stuart (December 24, 2007)

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!

Thank you for all your gifts all year long of warm thoughts, best wishes, internet hugs and electronic kisses :-)

An Explosion Outside of Heaven

R.O.I. is a financial acronym meaning "Return on Investment". It's a way to determine the value of what you've invested, usually in units of time and money.

As a parent or teacher you hope to be able to measure a R.O.I. in your children and students in units of their own greatness. We invest our hearts and minds and talents in the belief of their future greatness, measured in the amount they learn to see it in themselves.

How we define "greatness" has a large influence on how our children will define themselves.
I like how the musician Yanni speaks of greatness as defined by his father: "The best things in life are available to everyone. Like truth, imagination, creativity, love, kindness, compassion. So you see, greatness has nothing to do with success, or money, or possessions."

This morning when I walked in my classroom I received my ROI.

This is probably coming from the line, "10 days invested, in a child's self-esteem" from my poem "10 Days".

When you're a big giver, you risk running out. So it's nice when the love, compassion, belief, etc is given back. The more it's given the more it fills you up.

Since my children don't live with me it does hurt when they leave. A fact of life and nothing more.

"10 Days" ago I entered the gates of Heaven when they arrived. Yesterday these same gates closed as I watched them go. As I tried to write I struggled and at times felt pulled back into the depths of Hell.

So you can imagine how good I felt seeing two of them (Brosden and Bella) this morning in my classroom before school.

Now imagine leaving and coming back to see the suprise they had waiting for me.

Take that and mutliply it by 100, add 100 million, go around the world 100 times, and then beyond infinity 100 times more.

Now you're at the starting point for how I felt, knowing my investment of love and belief in them has grown into great love and belief among us.

And you'll also just begin to understand my conviction that, no matter how great the problem, how difficult the struggle, or how deep the pain, there is nothing, NOTHING, that cannot be overcome with LOVE and BELIEF, especially when children are involved.

It's not the size of the heart that matters most. A lot of good people have big hearts. What matters even more is the amount of love that can be exploded from it.

This morning there was an explosion outside of Heaven. My heart was swollen in the incident. And I think maybe I heard gates creaking open a little.

*Here Brosden and Bella are dancing to "Niki Nana" (We Are One)

Click "Slide Show" SLIDE SHOW

10 Days

10 days of happiness

10 pure days of bliss

10 days of loving

Spent in loving bliss

10 days now over

Of happy memories

10 days invested

In a child’s self-esteem

10 days forever

Used in loving ways

10 days gone 4ever

But not the memories

- Adam Stuart


*More pictures included in the Slide Show (click here)

Entering the Gates of Heaven

You are all back with your mothers now
Our time together done

For ten days I have been granted access into Heaven
Ten days of heavenly laughter and love

Although your pillows will be empty when I whisper
Tonight I will whisper again

With eyes closed pictures of you I'll hold
Waiting to hear "My Daddy loves me" whispered back from your soul

For the next two weeks I'll bargain with the Keepers of Time
Asking them to return every moment we spent to my mind

I will allow my heart to swell with all the good you've given to me
Until I can give back to you all the good inside of me

My house will then become a home again
As together we'll walk through the Gates of Heaven holding hands


*Irony. Ten days ago when I first got Sofia, I wrote about rising from Hell ("Hell's Angels"). My last day with her I write about having just left Heaven.

Sleeping Children

Sleeping children are a beautiful vision. Watching them having settled in for the night and resting peacefully makes a parent feel so much love for them, and for the miracle that has settled into their lives.

For me it has made me feel like whispering in their ears, "Daddy loves you" every night I've been with them since the day they were born. Sometimes I'll stay there, telling them all the reasons why I do, and how special each one is to me and why, until I start to wake them up.

Bella, all I have to do to get you to sleep is massage your back. If I whisper too much to you and your shoulder starts moving in involuntary jerks, I massage you back to sleep.



Sofia, you begin to rub your nose and face.

If I don't stop my whispers of adoration, you will sit up looking at me, then reach out for me to hug you.

Once I do you pull me down next to you and won't let go.

I am happily trapped in your tiny arms, and you allow me to get the sleep I seek.











Brosden, you lay motionless, and then suddenly will start answering me in your sleep.

One time when you answered "Yes, I know you love me Dad", I got so excited that I kept saying "You do? You do know how much I love you? How much do I love you? I love you soooooooo much, just as you are now. You don't need to be or do anything more for me to love you."

I waited anxiously for your response to my outpouring of emotion.

Then you said..............."If you love me so much, why don't you let me sleep?"

I covered my mouth to stop the laughter, then covered your face in kisses, and let you sleep.

Brosden Laughs

My son has many great gifts. He's smart and good-natured and athletically gifted. But his absolutely greatest gift is his ability to laugh. He sees the humor in things and drops to the ground rolling in laughter, infecting everyone around him.

Here are three pictures just from today, all at different times (awww, he just came up to see what I was doing and gave me a hug). I told him I was writing about what a terrible pizza-burning son he was (which is still in the sink if anyone's hungry).

Here he's practicing his baseball swing by hitting stones from the driveway. I pointed that he's hitting them in the direction of the road and asked what he'd do if he hit a passing car. He said "Run for it?"

Maybe I need a few more pages in that parenting book idea of mine :-)

Actually he grinned as he said it and then changed the direction he was hitting in. I pointed out that he was now hitting in the direction of the house next door.

Daddy, Look at Me!

I'm thinking of writing a book on parenting. It will consist of one page with one word on it. The title will be "Daddy Look at Me!"

On page one it will say

"Look".