For London Marie...and Us All

I'm very upset about the death of London Marie, the latest victim of SBS (shaken baby syndrome). Three-to-four babies A DAY die in the US from this. It is a real-life situation that's too bad, TOO BAD TO CONTINUE HAPPENING.

I know, I know...I can hear it now, "Oh, Adam....you silly, silly man. We can't stop it. It has been happening since man and his naked emotions first arrived on this planet

'Eve, I got to tell you I'm really upset about the whole apple incident.'

'You're blaming this on me? Listen Adam, if you would have planted the orange tree like I had asked you months ago I never would have had to pick that apple. YOU made me do it!'

'Me?!? You're blaming this on me? If you hadn't eaten the apple we'd be in paradise instead of thsi run-down motel! This is so like you...you....Hippo!'

"Oh no you did-ent! You.....Ape!'

Smack!

Smack!"

And so it began, and always will be.....emotional creatures unable to control their emotions. And babies will continue being shaken, children abused, marriages broken, people murdered, environments ruined, etc. etc. etc.

And there's nothing we can do about it......too many will say.

I say......A Life For a Life!

If SBS takes a life, we save two, or 2 million....AND WE STOP IT! It can stop...and it DOES stop, when WE do our part to stop it, no matter what it takes out of us to do it.

A few years ago, Tewani lost control of his emotions and tried to "shake" a classmate with a chair to the head. I caught the chair in one hand and grabbed Tewani with the other, dragging him into the hallway and pinning him against the wall with my forearm buried in his throat.

I angrily reminded him I had promised to protect him from anyone harming him in and out of the classroom, and I would protect anyone from being harmed by him. Tears poured out of his eyes, not from fear, but from incredible hurt and inner pain....exactly what causes people to hurt other people, including babies.

I remember looking at him and saying in an intense low growl (controlling my own temper) to, "...Use this great pain you feel to turn it into great power. Focus all of this hate you feel for the world for giving up on you and use it to develop yourself. Turn weaknesses into strengths. Give yourself that, and I promise you I will work with you EVERY SINGLE DAY we have left together to help you do this. And there is NOTHING I can't do that I focus on, JUST LIKE YOU! I am willing to focus on you. Help me out. Work WITH me, not against. TOGETHER we will defeat your demons."

Tewani went from being an angry, uncontrollable, dangerous student who was dangerously close to being held back again and a destructive member of society, to a happy, smiling, productive member of the class and society....who did better than he ever had and went on to 6th grade.

The cycle CAN be stopped. As humans we are responsible for our own actions and emotions. We believe we can control ourselves when the adults in our world control themselves. Strong emotions aren't bad. They just need to be controlled, controlled by a greater inner strength than outer. And this works when you have no strength left at all.

Last week Katie had given up on her science test and snuck out to go home. I had her brought back in to finish it, angrily telling her if I don't give up on her, she doesn't give up on herself. She started crying. Even though she's in the top 5% of readers in the US, she doesn't believe she can learn science, and that scares her, so she avoids it and runs away, unable to control her emotions.

I took her hands in mine and made a confession. I told her I was tired, and that I had nothing left. The only thing I could feel was an unconditional love for her, one that wouldn't let me give up on her in any way. I told her I would be here for her no matter how long it took, and no matter how much it took out of me, but I couldn't do it on my own. I needed her to do it with me.....She answered by leaping into my arms.

Emotions can be controlled, even when you feel you have no strength left whatsoever. And in our choices to love versus hate, to believe versus doubt, to fight versus do nothing, and to be completely vulnerable versus hardened and completely "invulnerable"....changes are made between two people, then two more, and then two more, and then the world.

Our worlds get better when WE get better.


As I receive this wonderful blessing below from Anita, I pass it on to you, and dedicate it to London, a life much too short.

This is a picture of her after she had just passed away.



Traditional Buddhist Blessing and Healing Chant

"Just as the soft rains fill the streams,
pour into the rivers and join together in the oceans,
so may the power of every moment of your goodness
flow forth to awaken and heal all beings,
Those here now, those gone before, those yet to come.
By the power of every moment of your goodness
May your heart's wishes be soon fulfilled
as completely shining as the bright full moon,
as magically as by a wish-fulfilling gem.

By the power of every moment of your goodness
May all dangers be averted and all disease be gone.
May no obstacle come across your way.
May you enjoy fulfillment and long life.

For all in whose heart dwells respect,
who follow the wisdom and compassion, of the Way,
May your life prosper in the four blessings
of old age, beauty, happiness and strength."


Our worlds DO get better when WE get better. I see it happen in my own life and students' lives year after year. It is possible to stop SBS, and for Baby Kaleb and London Marie, I'm going to do my part by filling my world with powerful life-changing love, and ask you to do the same.